When I told Gregarious Son about the Clothing-as-Identity Discussion, he said,
"Mom, maybe you and Wonderful Friend should stop buying and returning clothes, and accept that you are still yourselves and that your existing wardrobe is just fine."
The problem, I suppose, is that our lives are not fine. And so, neither, are our clothes.
I suppose, though, that we are still ourselves. I have said before that it seems that we grieve as we have lived. Wonderful Friend organized another Wonderful Friend's newly remodeled kitchen the other night. I pour over poetry sent my way by Jesuits. I could not find my way around a kitchen and she would not want to wade through this poetry. We each do what we can.
We are going to Key West for Christmas. "As long as you know that we will not feel any better," said the Lovely Daughter. I do know. What I think I am going for is the outer-edgeness of it -- the edge of the continent cracking and flattening and floating into islands, islands broken off from the mainland and almost submerged in the ocean.
And there I can wear soft t-shirts and my ancient and frayed khaki shorts and be the woman who walks the shore ~ the woman, perhaps, who I most am in a place whose geography will reflect my own.
10 comments:
I think it may be easier--or more acceptable, anyway--to "not feel any better" somewhere far away from your traditional Christmas.
(o)
The metaphors about Key West are interesting - could be a best choice out of options you wish you didn't have to consider. The Gregarious Son and the Lovely Daughter have wisdom among their talents.
LD and GS seem to have inherited their mother's gift for understanding human nature. And their ability to comment on these things in the ways they have is a testament to the depth of your relationship with them.
Key West seems like a perfect destination. Saltwater, sunshine, and warm air are incredible cures for what ails you. Hoping it is so this time.
while you are there, if you haven't been before, you might want to check out the Dry Tortugas--it's a 90 minute ride out to some astonishingly desolate and beautiful islands
(o)
May you find it to be so... and more.
GS & LD are very wise indeed. And I'm glad to hear that you're going to Key West. I just have a feeling that will be good, somehow.
Judi
Key West will be good. And being warmer, you can get away with wearing white after September! (vvvverrry obscure reference to considering the lilies in relation to clothes)
(((GG)))
I personally love the beach or any coastline as a place to ponder and breathe deeply about non-home things.
SO - go with God...
Deb
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